Wait. What?

My eyebrows are two different shapes, lengths and even sit at different elevation. I realized this a few months ago when I started to work on healing my skin.

I looked into the mirror one day and had one of those “wait. What?” moments that come in groups and can quickly turn into a plague of awareness.

How did this happen? How are my eyebrows so totally different?


A corner of my left eyebrow has been white since birth.

Ding Dang Lauren Bacall

When I was 9-years old, I picked up Lauren Bacall’s autobiography at a yard sale and read the first couple of chapters while eating chocolate covered espresso beans and trying to be my best adult self. I also picked up her raised eyebrow and the way I smoked cigarettes. My right eyebrow now shoots up whenever it wants to. My left eyebrow: A dormant wimp.

I was misinformed

Back in the day of print magazines for teens, the eyebrow plucking advice was pluck in line with the exterior of your nose. Unless you don’t have a narrow anglo nose. If you have a wide, Chinese-inspired nose, don’t pluck that far. Oh the rue.

So things went awry early and kept going awry well into the pluck to baldness oeuvre of the 1990’s. So now what? Be middle-aged with over plucked eyebrows?

It’s time to see a professional.

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